Tuesday Tunes

Billie Eilish – All Good Girls Go to Hell

Lyrics –

My Lucifer is lonely
Standing there, killing time
Can’t commit to anything but a crime
Peter’s on vacation, an open invitation
Animals, evidence
Pearly gates look more like a picket fence
Once you get inside ’em
Got friends but can’t invite them
Hills burn in California
My turn to ignore ya
Don’t say I didn’t warn ya
All the good girls go to hell
‘Cause even God herself has enemies
And once the water starts to rise
And heaven’s out of sight
She’ll want the devil on her team
My Lucifer is lonely
Look at you needing me
You know I’m not your friend without some greenery
Walk in wearing fetters
Peter should know better
Your cover up is caving in
Man is such a fool
Why are we saving him?
Poisoning themselves now
Begging for our help, wow!
Hills burn in California
My turn to ignore ya
Don’t say I didn’t warn ya
All the good girls go to hell
‘Cause even God herself has enemies
And once the water starts to rise
And heaven’s out of sight
She’ll want the devil on her team
My Lucifer is lonely
There’s nothing left to save now
My god is gonna owe me
There’s nothing left to save now

My two cents –

This artist surprises me. She is really talented, and her music appeals to the darkness in my soul. The video for this is cinematic and marvelous. The lyrics are pointed and speak so much of the world today.

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Tuesday Tunes

Unlike Pluto – Villain in my own Story

Lyrics –

I was the one who wanted nothing
I was the one who lived in pain
I was the one who strived for nothing
I was the one who stood in rain
I feel like I’m no good I should run away
I feel like failure’s one step ahead of me
Fuck all the people with the Bentley’s with their nice lives
Fuck all the people in the mansions with their bright skies
Fuck all the people sitting pretty with their sane minds
Fuck, think I’m becoming the villain of my story
I am the one that’s holding grudges
I am the one that lives in pain
I am the one who’s out of touch and
I am the one inflicting pain
I feel like I’m no good I should run away
I feel like failure’s one step ahead of me
Fuck all the people with the Bentley’s with their nice lives
Fuck all the people in the mansions with their bright skies
Fuck all the people sitting pretty with their sane minds
Fuck, think I’m becoming the villain of my story
And I’ve been the bad guy for so long, I’m growing tired
Is it too damn late to twist the plot to turn it round

My two cents –

I have been doing a lot of thinking about perspective lately. Especially since writing my memoir. We are all the villain in someone else’s story. When we become the villain in our own story is when we start to change. I know that my story as seen by others was different than it was for me. I can’t speak from their point of view. I can only speak my truth. So, when I tell my story… It will always be shaded by my perception. How it affected me. How it changed me. I try to look at others perspective, but it is not easy with some situations.

Inspiration without a home is a memoir. My story. It is not completely linear… Nor should it be. There is stories about abuse, about rape. There is a life in those pages. Not a good life, but one lived. That life created the woman I am today. And I am at least remotely sure that I was the villain of some of the story as told by others.

Tuesday Tunes

Welcome back all of my lovely friends. Today’s song is a very deep and fun verse.

Dollhouse by Melanie Martinez

Lyrics :

Hey girl, open the walls, play with your dolls
We’ll be a perfect family
When you walk away, it’s when we really play
You don’t hear me when I say,
Mom, please wake up
Dad’s with a slut, and your son is smoking cannabis
No one never listens, this wallpaper glistens
Don’t let them see what goes down in the kitchen
Places, places, get in your places
Throw on your dress and put on your doll faces
Everyone thinks that we’re perfect
Please don’t let them look through the curtains
Picture, picture, smile for the picture
Pose with your brother, won’t you be a good sister?
Everyone thinks that we’re perfect
Please don’t let them look through the curtains
D-O-L-L-H-O-U-S-E
I see things that nobody else sees
(D-O-L-L-H-O-U-S-E
I see things that nobody else sees)
Hey…

My two cents :

I think that at some point each of us has had the moment where we hope that no one looks in the curtains. The outside world always sees only the superficial. Anything that is forced will never be comfortable. What do you make of this song? Do you like it? Why?

Tuesday tunes

So usually I choose one song. Which really works… But today I want something slightly different. Today I want to do a small group of songs. A playlist if you will. I am pansexual, and I have had relationships with both male and female. I don’t plan on putting the details up, and I don’t want to put the lyrics up for these. My opinion is going to be on the topic more than individual songs. The songs were chosen for this playlist purposely.

Too many of the so called lesbian love songs don’t sit right with me. To me a true love song should be good whether it is for a female or a male. These definitely have a female target, but it would work for either gender. Many, if sung by a different singer, would be made hetro.

I love that idea. The songs excite the heart in me. The poet who loves to see love in all of its facets. See lyrics are not gendered. The singer, the tempo it is sung at, these all what affects our, as listeners, perception of it. That is why some covers come across better to an individual ear than the original.

Everyone I have ever had in my life has a song that reminds me of them. Some songs I only listen to if I need to pull them from the mind, for good or ill. The first song on this list belongs to someone I once loved dearly. She hurt me because she was raw from another hurting her. Still I love her and I miss her, even if it hurt me to have her near. I will never wish her ill. It is the only song that is that meaningful for me.

I am just going to share the playlist from YouTube. If you can think of any that I missed… Let me know.

Playlist abuse

*Tw- please don’t listen to any of these songs if you are in a bad place.

Due to the nature of these I am not going to do links. This is by no means all of the songs of this nature, feel free to comment any that I have missed.

#
“25 Years”, by Pantera
“13 ‘N Good”, by Boogie Down Productions & KRS-One

A
“Aawaz – Speak Up Against Sexual Violence”, by Jim Ankan Deka
“Adam Raised a Cain”, by Bruce Springsteen
“Alive”, by Pearl Jam
“All Day Long” , by New Order
“Alyssa Lies”, by Jason Michael Carroll
“Amelia”, by The Mission
“Anger Rising”, by Jerry Cantrell
“Ask Me”, by Amy Grant
“Apollo”, by Hardwell
“A Gunshot to the Head of Trepidation, by Trivium
“Angels” by Within Temptation

B
“Bachpan”, by Rameez Khalid
“Baby’s Romance”, by Chris Garneau
“Bad Wisdom”, by Suzanne Vega
“Ballerina”, by Nicole 12
“Because of You”, by Kelly Clarkson
“Black”, by Okkervil River
“Bang my Head against the Wall”, by Sia
“Blown Away”, by Carrie Underwood
“The Blue Flashing Light”, by Travis
“Broken Angel”, by Boyce Avenue
“Broken Girl”, by Matthew West
“Brisbane Hotel Sutra”, by The Mountain Goats
“Break The Chain (One-Billion Rising)”, by V-day
“Broom People”, by The Mountain Goats
“Beer Bottles”, by Arek Mahaga Bryant
“Bottle Dreams”, by Eyedea
“Barbarism Begins at Home”, by The Smiths

C
“Camisado”, by Panic! at the Disco
“Candles”, by Daughter
“Candyman”, by Siouxsie and the Banshees
“Carnival”, by Natalie Merchant
“Castle on a Cloud”, from Les Misérables
“Child Called ‘It'”, by Buckcherry
“Children Of The Night”, by Richard Marx
“Concrete Angel”, by Martina McBride
“Confessions of a Broken Heart”, by Lindsay Lohan
“Cleanin’ Out My Closet”, by Eminem
“Cleaning Out My Closet”, by Angel Haze
“Clown”, by Korn
“Cradle”, by Mudvayne
“Convex, Concave”, by Biffy Clyro
“Cousin Kevin”, by The Who

D
“Daddy”, by Korn
“Daddy didn’t love me”, by Andrew Jackson Jihad
“Dance Music”, by The Mountain Goats
“Damaged”, by Plumb
“Daughter”, by Pearl Jam
“Day Six: Childhood”, by Ayreon
“Down with the Sickness”, by Disturbed
“Drunk Daddy”, by the Cherry Poppin’ Daddies
“Disarm”, by Smashing Pumpkins
“Dead Babies”, by Alice Cooper
“Devil in a Midnight Mass”, by Billy Talent
“Don’t Let Daddy Kiss Me”, by Motörhead
“Daddy’s Girl”, by Scorpions
“Dear Mr. Jesus”, by PowerSource
“Dirty Night Clowns”, by Chris Garneau
“Dollhouse”, by Melanie Martinez

E
“Enough’s Enough”, by Alice Cooper
“Eva”, by Nightwish
“End Of Me”, by A Day To Remember
“Evidence”, by Tara MacLean
“Everyone’s Gone to the Movies”, by Steely Dan
“Expose Yourself to Kids”, by GG Allin

F
“Face Down”, by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
“Facade” by Disturbed
“Falling Away from Me”, by Korn
“Family Portrait”, by P!nk
“Family Tree”, by Megadeth
“Father”, by LL Cool J
“Father”, by The Front Bottoms
“Family Portrait ” by Pink
“Fee Fi Fo”, by The Cranberries
“Fiddle About”, by The Who
“Fire On Babylon”, by Sinéad O’Connor
“Five”, by Machine Head
“For Adrian (Many Years Ago)”, by Jim White
“For The Love of a Daughter”, by Demi Lovato
“For You”, by Staind
“From Daughter to Father”, by Secret Scapegoats
“Fistful Of Love” By Antony And The Johnsons

G
“God Gave Us Life”, by Half Man Half Biscuit
“God Has a Plan for Us All”, by Angtoria
“Gunpowder & Lead” by Miranda Lambert
“Goodbye Earl” by the Dixie chicks

H
“Hast Thou Considered the Tetrapod”, by The Mountain Goats
“The Day the Aliens Came (Hawaiian Feeling)”, by The Mountain Goats
“He”, by Jars of Clay
“Hell Is for Children”, by Pat Benatar
“Hello” by Evanescence
“He Hit Me (It Felt Like A Kiss)” by the crystals
“Hero”, by Superchick
“His Daughter”, by Molly Kate Kestner
“Holy Water”, by Big & Rich
“Howard’s Tale”, by Sick Puppies
“Homeless”, by Marina Kaye
“Hopeful”, by Bars and Melody
“Harvester of Sorrow”, by Metallica
“How Could You Leave Us”, by NF
“The Hush”, by Hellyeah
“His Daughter” by Molly Kate Kestner

I
“I am One of Them”, by Aly & AJ
“I Have a Right” by Sonata Arctica
“Innocence”, by Seventh Day Slumber
“Independence Day” by Martina McBride
“In Harm’s Way”, by Metal Church
“In Your Care”, by Tasmin Archer
“In the Night”, by The Weeknd
“Insane”, by Eminem
“I’m OK”, by Christina Aguilera
“I’ll Pay You to Shoot Him”, by Megan McCauley
“In a Darkened Room”, by Skid Row
“I’m a Boy”, by The Who
“I Left My Heart in Papworth General”, by Half Man Half Biscuit

J
“Janie’s Got a Gun”, by Aerosmith
“Jordan, Minnesota”, by Big Black
“Just Like You”, by Three Days Grace
“Just Because of What You Did”, by Secret Scapegoats

K
“Kristy, Are You Doing Okay?”, by The Offspring
“K.Y.A.” by Flotsam and Jetsam

L
“La La La”, by Naughty Boy
“Leave the Light On”, by Beth Hart
“The Little Girl”, by John Michael Montgomery
“Little House”, by The Fray
“Little Toy Guns”, by Carrie Underwood
“Lion’s Teeth”, by The Mountain Goats
“Love – Suicide”, by Monster KID
“Luka”, by Suzanne Vega
“Let You Down”, by NF
“Little Susie”, by Michael Jackson

L
“La La La”, by Naughty Boy
“Leave the Light On”, by Beth Hart
“The Little Girl”, by John Michael Montgomery
“Little House”, by The Fray
“Little Toy Guns”, by Carrie Underwood
“Lion’s Teeth”, by The Mountain Goats
“Love – Suicide”, by Monster KID
“Luka”, by Suzanne Vega
“Let You Down”, by NF
“Little Susie”, by Michael Jackson

M
“Magdalena”, by Frank Zappa and the Mothers
“Mansion”, by NF
“Millie Pulled a Pistol on Santa/Keepin’ the Faith”, by De La Soul
“Missed Me”, by The Dresden Dolls
“My Mom”, by Eminem
“Me and Little Andy”, by Dolly Parton
“Mommy”, by Mushroomhead
“Mr. Tinkertrain”, by Ozzy Osbourne
“My Decision”, by Eric Himan
“A Million Men”, by Melanie Martinez
“My Skin” by Natalie Merchant

N
“Never Again”, by Nickelback
“Never Too Late”, by Three Days Grace
“No Place Like Home”, by Mesh
“No Son of Mine”, by Genesis
“Nowhere To Stand”, by k.d. lang
“Numb”, by Linkin Park

O
“Open Wounds”, by Skillet
“Oh, Father”, by Madonna
“Oh, Mother”, by Christina Aguilera
“Outside Of That” by Bessie Smith
“One and Only”, by The Young Dubliners
“Ohio”, by Jacob Whitesides
“One Last Breath”, by Creed

P
“Pale Green Things”, by The Mountain Goats
“Papa”, by Prince
“Petals”, by Mariah Carey
“Points of Authority”, by Linkin Park
“Perfect ” by simple plan
“Polly”, by Nirvana
“Pretty”, by Korn
“Prison Sex”, by Tool
“Pushit”, by Tool
“Praying” by Ke$ha

Q
“A Question of Time”, by Depeche Mode
“A Quick One, While He’s Away”, by The Who

R
“Razor Blade”, by Blue October
“Remember Everything”, by Five Finger Death Punch
“Runaway Love”, by Ludacris
“Runaway Train”, by Soul Asylum
“Rusted from the Rain” by Billy Talent

S
“Saturday”, by Hedley
“Sandy Fishnets”, by Evelyn Evelyn
“Shine”, by Cold
“Show Me the Way”, by Styx
“Sleep”, by Stabbing Westward
“Sleep Like a Baby Tonight” , by U2
“Slide”, by The Dresden Dolls
“Steven”, by Jake Miller
“Secrets” by David Hodges
“Suggestion”, by Fugazi
“Superficial Addiction”, by Monster KID
“Superheroes”, by The Script
“Sippy Cup”, by Melanie Martinez
“Suffer Little Children”, by The Smiths
“Stone Cold Dead In The Market (He Had It Coming)” by Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Jordan

T
“Tell Me There’s a Heaven”, by Chris Rea
“The Ballad of Dwight Fry”, by Alice Cooper
“The Dreadful Hours”, by My Dying Bride
“The Evangelist”, by Spawn of Possession
“The monster”, by insane clown posse
“Three Points on a Compass”, by Martin Rossiter
“This Life Is Mine”, by Jeff Williams
“This Year”, by The Mountain Goats
“Tier”, by Rammstein
“A Trophy Father’s Trophy Son”, by Sleeping With Sirens
“Too Beautiful”, by He Is We
“The Father Who Must Be Killed”, by Morrissey
“The Hand That Rocks The Cradle”, by The Smiths
“The Other Side”, by Smile Empty Soul
“Two Beds and a Coffee Machine”, by Savage Garden
“Till it happens to you ” by Lady Gaga

U
“Uncle Jack”, by Mötley Crüe
“Uncle Salty”, by Aerosmith
“Universal Child”, by Annie Lennox

W
“Waking Up to The Big Drill Pad”, by Flatsound
“Wash Away Those Years”, by Creed
“What About”, by Janet Jackson
“What’s It Gonna Take”, by Ronnie McDowell
“What’s the Matter Here”, by 10,000 Maniacs
“When Did This Storm Begin”, by Shiny Toy Guns
“Wonderful”, by Everclear
“Warrior”, by Demi Lovato
“Wrong again” by Martina McBride

Y
“Years Ago”, by Alice Cooper
“You”, by Everclear
“You Knocked the Love (Right Outta My Heart)”, by Millie Jackson

Tuesday Tunes

Hello my lovelies. Welcome back for another song. Tell me in the comments what you are listening to today?

Today I bring you

Aerosmith- Janie’s Got a Gun

Lyrics –

[Verse 1]
Dum, dum, dum, honey what have you done?
Dum, dum, dum it’s the sound of my gun
Dum, dum, dum, honey what have you done?
Dum, dum, dum it’s the sound

[Chorus 1]
Janie’s got a gun
Janie’s got a gun
Her whole world’s come undone
From lookin’ straight at the sun
What did her daddy do?
What did he put you through?

[Verse 2]
They said when Janie was arrested
They found him underneath a train
But man, he had it comin’
Now that Janie’s got a gun
She ain’t never gonna be the same

[Chorus 2]
Janie’s got a gun
Janie’s got a gun
Her dog day’s just begun
Now everybody is on the run
Tell me now it’s untrue
What did her daddy do?
He jacked a little bitty baby
The man has got to be insane
They say the spell that he was under the lightning and
The thunder knew that someone had to stop the rain

[Chorus 3]
Run away, run away from the pain yeah, yeah yeah
Run away run away from the pain yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Run away, run away, run, run away

[Chorus 2]
Janie’s got a gun
Janie’s got a gun
Her dog day’s just begun
Now everybody is on the run

[Verse 2]
What did her daddy do?
It’s Janie’s last I.O.U
She had to take him down easy and put a bullet in his brain
She said cause nobody believes me. The man was such a sleeze
He ain’t never gonna be the same

[Chorus 3]
Run away, run away from the pain yeah, yeah
Yeah yeah yeah
Run away run away from the pain yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Run away, run away, run, run away

[Guitar Solo]

[Chorus 2]
Janie’s got a gun
Janie’s got a gun
Janie’s got a gun
Now everybody is on the run

[Outro]
Janie’s got a gun
Her dog day’s just begun
Now everybody is on the run (Honey honey, what’s the problem?)
Because Janie’s got a gun (Tell me it ain’t right)
Janie’s got a gun (Was it Daddy’s cradle robbing that)
Her dog day’s just begun (Made you scream at night?)
Now everybody is on the run
Janie’s got a gun

My two cents :

This song brought me comfort as a teen. I am an abuse survivor… And I was not believed. So I was a very angry teenager. I really think that most teens are angry. The injustice of being too young to do adult things and too old to be a kid. But I was fighting battles that I had no idea of how to deal with. This song spoke about vengeance against abuse. It spoke to the angry in me. I still love the song for that reason. It speaks to the part of me that has never seen justice. I have a lovely playlist that I may share… There is a lot of songs that talk about abuse… A lot more than most people realize exist.

Tuesday Tunes

Hozier – Take me to church

Lyrics –

My lover’s got humor
She’s the giggle at a funeral
Knows everybody’s disapproval
I should’ve worshiped her sooner
If the Heavens ever did speak
She is the last true mouthpiece
Every Sunday’s getting more bleak
A fresh poison each week
“We were born sick”, you heard them say it
My church offers no absolutes
She tells me ‘worship in the bedroom’
The only heaven I’ll be sent to
Is when I’m alone with you
I was born sick, but I love it
Command me to be well
Amen, Amen, Amen
Take me to church
I’ll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
I’ll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
Take me to church
I’ll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
I’ll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
If I’m a pagan of the good times
My lover’s the sunlight
To keep the Goddess on my side
She demands a sacrifice
To drain the whole sea
Get something shiny
Something meaty for the main course
That’s a fine looking high horse
What you got in the stable?
We’ve a lot of starving faithful
That looks tasty
That looks plenty
This is hungry work
Take me to church
I’ll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
I’ll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
Take me to church
I’ll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
I’ll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
No masters or kings when the ritual begins
There is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin
In the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene
Only then I am human
Only then I am clean
Amen, Amen, Amen
Take me to church
I’ll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
I’ll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
Take me to church
I’ll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
I’ll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life

My two cents *

I love the innuendo in this. The background meaning. Religion is such a personal thing, one that is often used to do major harm to each other.