Ok… Let’s face it… This blog thing… I am still trying to get used to it. I have been incredibly random about when I update… I am trying to get better at that. Part of the problem is that I post all of my updates when I think of them…. Then I am sitting around scratching my head…..crap.. What do I write on here now? It really is a first world problem.
Sure I can, and often do, share poems that I write. Or update you on progress in my other writing. Rant about crap that irks me. But, in order to keep the blog active… I need to be more regular. So I think that I will start using the schedule feature. Limit myself to posting one update per day and schedule the rest for future days. This will hopefully stretch out the updates and make sure that I stay an active blog.
If there is something you would like to see me discuss… Hey let me know. New topics really can help me to do new posts.
Creative folks are sensitive, and often it’s the little things that send us into waves of self doubt and wavering, crushing questions about our own worth.
Now I am not claiming that you should not be honest with those folks. Quite the opposite. Just be aware that jumping a creative soul for a miscommunication is likely to cause them to question their own worth. Their own value and whether the work that they they do is worth showing to the world.
So before jumping off the deep end when you are dealing with a creative soul, consider if they were aware of how things went on the other end? Consider asking instead of jumping on them. Because if you are wrong, you will result in them questioning their own worth. Questioning whether they have anything worth putting out into a busy world.
In all things please, be kind first. You don’t know who’s life it might save. And if you decide that you dislike what they have created? Again answer with kindness. Telling the creative to go kill themselves, well the likelihood of them taking it to heart is high. Think before you speak. Or risk the death of another creative soul.
Be kind to each other, for the human race needs one another.
This is the hard time for me to keep up with my blog. So I apologize. Between sick, which seems to be a yearly thing, and birthdays… February and March are busy months for me. I am also working out the details for publishing another poetry volume (Soul Door), a novel as Serena (Rust, Gore, And the Junkyard Zombie) and I have a poem that I submitted to a new E-zine (Creatives Rising)
that is releasing soon. I am also still writing more poetry and the next novel. I will be updating this blog as I can, and I promise that I will post a couple more poems here by the end of the week. Still, Please have patience with my erratic updates.
so Insomnia is kicking my butt. I decided to do a month of prompts in December… And the group did another for this month. Well I was feeling extra creative and decided to put the ones that I have done for January to lovely picture files. Please enjoy as I try to pretend that I am sleeping… Again.
I’m sick. And when I get sick, I get maudlin. I got a notice that I was getting a deposit from Amazon for the books that I have available. It is the biggest deposit yet, a whole $2.77. That amazes me. It is a sign that people are buying the books that I have written… Mostly poetry, but I have some children’s books and a novella (as Serena).
When I told my mother that I was published her first question was if I had made any money. At the time I stumbled with my answer because I had only made thirty some cents. The fact that I had made anything was a miracle to me, but I knew that would not be what she wanted to hear.
For me, publishing is only a way of being heard. Still, making enough from my writing to buy a drink…. Well it humbles me. Would I like to be able to pay the bills through it? Well of course. I am not stupid. I just choose to be thankful for the small things. How often does changing the perspective change the way something feels?
Small miracles lift up the downtrodden. I choose to see this as a small miracle, so that I am uplifted. What perspective can you change to adjust your view?
(Picture borrowed from Debbie Burns, head unicorn and founder of Debbieburns.me all rights to it are hers)
My writing mentor posted this picture earlier. It brings up a topic that I believe I would like to try and tackle. I have no doubt of how capable I am. I am aware of my strengths, my flaws, and the areas I need to work on. Still I have moments where I question my worth.
Now I could blame my past for that doubt. Claim that I am flawed because no one has ever seen my worth….but I really hate that. It is possible to both know your capability and to doubt your worth. I am a strong and open minded individual, still I struggle. I don’t see what others claim is talent. I see a lifetime of fighting. Of me trying to be half of what those around me said I was.
I struggle because this is the path I see. I stuggle because I refuse to quit. Perhaps the above is true, perhaps some can see the ability within and it will set them free…still not all of those who are struggling fail to see their own capability. I am a strong woman, I have a generous heart. I am creative, with a quick mind. I am a survivor who has learned to be more….still I have days when I don’t understand the love everyone around me has for the broken soul I am. Days when I am the one that sees too much of life and has no way of processing it.
This is just part of being me. Those who love me generally understand those days. They are quick to reach to help me understand why I am loved. And even then I understand my capability…even as I have no understanding of my self worth.
With so much requiring our attention, this time of year is not always a productive time for us writers. Well at least in a personal sense. Between Nanowrimo and the November PAD challenges, and other writing, there is more than enough people looking for our attention. Add in normal Seasonal blues that many have, and it can be overwhelming.
Personally, I find myself an anxious mess about the amount I am expected to join in. I chose not to do Nano this year because of the amount of stuff I have going on in my personal life…still I am finding that other writers are looking for me to join. I am so glad that I have friends that include me. There is always something to be said for that.
I have been doing the PAD challenge. I also have managed to get a bit farther in Rust, Gore and the Junkyard Zombie. I believe that 2018 will be a wonderful year for book releases. Many wonderful writers are doing Nano this year. I am cheering them on.
However, with all that I have going on, life is weighing heavy on this girl right now. It means that I am finding my spoon supply a lot smaller. Forgive me my sweet ones if I fail to post more that a couple times during the next two months. I will do my best to keep all my balls I am juggling in the air, but if one falls…I will just have to dust myself off and try some more.